Friday morning brings us two sides of the same coin – on one side, King Klopp is saying that Liverpool are ‘unlikely’ to sign a centre-back during the pandemic and by pandemic, I hope he means January transfer window. On the other side of said coin, rumour is Sergio Ramos fancies a move to Liverpool in the perfect reversal of Jurgen’s claim of ‘the only reason anyone would move from Liverpool to Madrid is for the weather’. I guess he fancies standing shoulder to should with Mo Salah.

Now, if I was West Ham and Ajax came knocking for a striker I’d written off as ‘not good enough’ then I’d probably start thinking I’d missed something. Not Sullivan, Gold and Brady though – what do Ajax know, eh? And with that, Seba Haller toddles off to Amsterdam for £25m – just the small matter of a £20m loss on that one, chaps.

Robert Snodgrass is also departing, though not such an exciting move for the Scotland international, sadly. He’s off to the Hawthorns to be part of the first team Sam Allardyce takes down.

DC United might need to look elsewhere for their brand booster as word on the Arsenal street is that Mesut Ozil is off to Fenerbahce. It really is a toss-up between the USA and Turkey for the modern-day retirement home, isn’t it?

Wolves fans getting excited about Diego Costa arriving at Molineux might need to hold fire. Nuno has been on the blower to Italy and asked Fiorentina to fly back Patrick Cutrone ASAP. The club are hoping that the young Italian frontman who started so well at AC Milan might be a good cheap option whilst they wait for Raul Jiminez to recover.

In an interview with Jamie Carragher, Wilf Zaha revealed he’d spoken to Unai Emery about joining Arsenal and that to sign him ‘was a no-brainer’ – and Arsenal then signed Nicolas Pepe. In fairness, you’d have to conclude that Wilf was right.